Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Randomize
