Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize
