Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
