Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
