I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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