Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
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