Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
