Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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