This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize