You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
