So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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