so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
