Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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