Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Fuck appropriateness.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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