I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
