there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize