My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
