i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize