Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
