i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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