We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize