I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
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