i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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