to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
