Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
