Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
