Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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