did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Randomize
