I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
