So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
