when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
