Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
