Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
