I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
