i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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