I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
