He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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