i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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