did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
what day is it and did you see me today?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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