lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Swine flu is the new snow day.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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