i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize