Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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