Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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