I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
