Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Randomize
