At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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