I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
