And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
