So drunk, too bad you don't want this
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
i think my cat just said my name.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize