I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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