Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Pants are for mortals
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Randomize
