Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize